Happy Friday the 13th.

I was going to go watch a movie today with Claudia G and her friends, but it turned out that I didn't have a ride -_- What luck.


I just read a few articles about the Flight 3407 crash in New York last night. Tragedy. 49 people on the plane and a man on the ground were killed. The man was in his house with his wife and daughter. The ladies got out safely.

Is it just me or are we starting to hear a lot more about plane crashes lately? Ok, maybe not more. But I mean, the Flight 1549 fall was a "miracle," but that happened just a month ago. The short span of time in between is a little unnerving. Apparently, the last deadly commercial plane crash was in 2006. Two years. There's a big perceived difference between 2 years and 1 month. Obviously, it doesn't affect the chances, but it still scares people more when two airplanes fall within a small period of time.

Still, people have estimated the chances of dying in a plane crash to be about 1 in 11 million, or so I've heard. Such a round number, don't you think? I wonder how people got to this probability. Again, I'm thinking, "Ok. I've got numbers, but they won't protect me from my chances of dying." But hey, if numbers make you feel safe, then stick to the numbers.

Ah, there was also an article in which two would-be 3407 passengers were interviewed about their "close call." Yes, it's great they didn't get on the plane and die. They should be grateful to be alive, as should everyone else every day, right? Riight. It's not luck; it's chance.

Every time I hear people say they were lucky or something like that, I just want to shake them and say, "You were lucky for a moment, not a lifetime." For all we know, we could survive something one minute and die from something else the next. Not very (good) lucky. Bad luck, right? Good and bad luck can fluctuate so easily, whether you're a good person. No. I don't think so. It's not luck.

Luck has lost its meaning to me. I still try to remember what it used to mean to me: "increased" chances of something (good or bad) happening. But what does that matter? We wish people luck (mostly good, I hope) all the time. Does an explicit sentence of goodwill really increase another person's chances of doing better or getting something good? I don't know maybe. If only the world really worked that way. We'd be getting what we want based on the number of good friends we have and good people we meet, who really do wish the best for us. What a great life that would be.

Now, why did I start talking about luck again? Hmm. Oh yeah, I don't really know, but I get confused by people sometimes. Now, I'm not going to diss religion. I'm actually going to diss the believers.

Why do some people thank God for their good fortunes but blame themselves or other people for their misfortunes? I think God, if he exists, should receive either both blame and praise or neither. Believers make their God seem so arrogant. He only deserves praise? Really? Not much better than some people here on Earth.

And if you are so lucky and loved by God, what about the other people who don't live long enough to thank him? Are they not as lucky or as loved? You really think you're better than them? When people say things like "God was watching over me," it makes me wonder why he didn't watch over the others. So it seems like he doesn't control death, but he can negotiate your life. Hmm. What makes you so much more important to him than other people?

I used to believe in God. Not the religious, by-the-Bible kind of God. Just a god, a somebody to talk to when I was younger, who would know my problems without making me explain everything. It would just understand, be there for me, and help me make the "right" decisions. Sometimes, it would be in my head; other times, in my books or my pillow. Maybe, it would be an imaginary friend. I don't talk to it as much anymore. Of course, a nonbeliever could just say that I've been talking to myself all these years. Who knows? Maybe I was a very imaginative and creative child with a split personality that "faded" away. The point is God was somebody I talked to, not someone who controlled my life.

What I realized over the past few years of my life is that there's a difference between the God people want and the God that people need. The one we want is one to make the rules, to tell us what we should and shouldn't do, and to look up to. Or maybe that was Christ. Sorry, I used to confuse the two until about the 7th grade when I heard that Jesus was supposed to be the son of God. Yeah, I got it, but I still forget who was supposed to do what sometimes.

Anyway, the God we need is one whom we can talk to and reason with. Obviously, it's going to be a one-sided argument. But its "presence" is supposed to reassure us that we are doing and will do well in our lives. It will always listen without judging us. However, apparently, God does judge us, so hmm, maybe I've been talking to the wrong god.


Ah, I need to work on my self-expression, especially in words. I need to remember what I want to say. There's no "ending" to that^ because I forgot. So I'm just going to leave it at that haha.

Oh, so another topic from my newspaper puzzle page: either capital punishment or abortion clinics. Oh, or American freedom. Hmm. Some controversial stuff, yeah?


Capital punishment. I didn't know what that was until maybe my sophomore year in high school. I heard it all the time, but I never asked what it was. I knew what death penalty and execution meant. I mean, I watched a lot of movies, so I had to catch on. And I didn't learn what capital punishment was from my teachers either. I learned it from TV. Primarily, "Law and Order." Great show, btw.

Anyway, do I support or oppose capital punishment? I'm not 100& sure of it, but for now I support it. Why? Vindication. Murderers and serial killers might not have done anything to me personally, but that doesn't mean I don't think they deserve a death sentence. A life for a life, right? It's the law's version of saying "an eye for eye." What's the purpose of capital punishment? To prevent future threats. Obviously, it's not going to prevent or reduce all crimes. Petty thieves won't be affected. Killers will become more adept at killing and hiding. But it's a "civilized" person's way of seeking revenge. It's difficult to think that someone you know is dead because of a person and that person it still alive. So if their death can soothe a mourner, then soothe away. Right?

Besides, it's a punishment. That's what punishment is for: to dissuade people from doing things and to penalize them for doing things. A jail sentence just means they're locked away and being either "catered" to or harrassed by guards and correctional officers. Hmm, the death penalty is, well, a penalty. Of course, it's not going to have a long-lasting effect on the punished, but it will be a permanent solution. Though, I'm not sure if it's a solution. It's still just a preventative measure. And vengeance.

Hah, I should talk about vigilantism. Now, there's some crazy vengeance for ya.


Now, I'm not sure I want to say anything about abortion. Whether women should be allowed to have abortions is an issue that I tend to flip flop on a lot. Fetus, baby, unborn child, product of conception, whatever names we use... It's hard to decide. And I know, don't flip flop and choose a side. People give me shit for it. Well, sorry, geez. It's not a decision I can make on the spot. I like to think things through before I blindly commit to something.

This argument basically pits the right to choose against the right to live. A woman's right versus a fetus' life. For the sake of consistency, I'm going to use the term "fetus." "Baby" sways us toward one side, while "product of conception" leaves us open to the other.

3 debatable parts: Is the fetus a living human being? Does it have the same rights as a born person? If so, whose rights are more important, the mother's or the child's?

I think we can all agree that a woman has the right to abort when her life is in danger and there is little to no chance of the fetus surviving. Right? Or are we going to argue about the relative importance of both lives as well? And I know that people are divided about rape victims having abortions (unless it was incestuous rape).

Ok, so the crucial point of this issue is whether the fetus is considered a being in the womb. If it's alive, then abortion is murder. If it's not, then abortion should be ok because it's just a part of a woman's body. In the womb, the fetus develops its structure (nails, eyes, heart, etc). I'm not sure if the fetus breathes, but I know it can move. Some could argue that the fetus is only some living tissue within a woman. It might have its own DNA, but it can't think for itself. Hmm.

Does a fetus have rights? I mean, in the US, we say every American has the right to "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." Does a fetus on American territory have those rights given to us in the Declaration of Independence? Is it a citizen? Well, a baby becomes a citizen in the country in which it is born, not conceived. Its name isn't officially on a birth certificate until it is born. So, by law, it's not considered a citizen yet. At least not on paper. But if a mother aborts, does that mean she denies the fetus its right to become a citizen and therefore denies its rights to those written rights? Oh, so confusing.

Whose rights are more important? I'm not gonna detail all the possible reasons a woman would abort. There's too many possibles. So, who has the primary right? What is the primary right, if any? We pretty much consider every right to be equal in weight (probably why these kinds of issues are so difficult to deal with). The woman is a citizen. The fetus may or may not be considered a citizen. I'm not sure I could reason this part out. So I say, "?"

Also, I do hope people know that banning abortion won't stop abortions from happening. Just because something's illegal doesn't mean it's not gonna happen. We have laws against murder. There are still murders happening in every state. If abortion is completely banned, some women probably will resort to desperate measures to abort.

And yeah, there's the adoption option, but it's not always an appealing one. I'm not going into it though. Too much about it that I'm sure I don't know.

I'm not even going to get into whether the father has a say or not. That just complicates this issue, and it's also its own separate issue. It's like the product of abortion and custody issues. And that can get ugly.

And why do we call it an abortion? Gosh, sounds like we're quitting a computer program or something, but I guess it is technically an appropriate term. A premature termination. Mm.


The freedom thing will come another time. Maybe. Well, I basically wanted to say that "freedom isn't free" is a good quote. It can mean a lot of things, but we know what it means to each of us. When born, we have "human rights." I'm not sure, but our "human rights" have been determined by the higher council. Ultimately, though, I think human rights in essence are our rights to do whatever we want, can, and choose. But to be defined as "human," we give up the right to murder in order to keep the right to live. Being citizens of a nation, we give up rights to trespass and to steal for the rights to have privacy and to keep our possessions. We give up some rights to keep other rights in tact. Of course, we know some people don't live by "our rules" and live by their own. Yada yada yada. I'll continue some other time. Maybe.


^All opinion. Mostly not completely developed. I need to do some more reading, listening and learning about the topics.