I feel like I ruined Thanksgiving for my family.

Last night, Brother and his girlfriend, Karina, took me and Vivi to Singlebarrel. First time there for us two. Pretty awesome. Would like to come back eventually. I had a Pink Lady and an English Cosmo (Shiva's recommendation). Liked them.

Though, the thought of alcohol right now makes me queasy >.<

We went to Brix afterward. Vivi and I split a Tokyo Tea. (queasy again) I had to keep her from drinking too much too fast. But I ended up doing that. At some point, Brother and Karina came to us with two more drinks. Did not finish.

Whether I finished them or not, I would have gotten sick anyway. Before midnight.

A lot of firsts last night. First time Vivi and I got seriously inebriated together. First time I've gotten totally messed up in public. First time I've ever been escorted out of a club. First time I've ever puked out of a car window.

I have vowed to stop drinking for the next four months. Not even beer. Not even for New Year's. I'll be a DD if I go clubbing.

Oh man, people at Brix are gonna remember me... I was wearing my teethy hat. If they see it, they'll remember me. Bleh.

Spent the night at Karina's. Puked throughout the night and morning. Didn't leave to go home until 1pm.

So Mother is really pissed off at me and Brother because she thinks I never tried to call her to tell her I wasn't coming home. I tried. She never answered her phone. She called me, but I never heard her call. So she thinks I was ignoring her call. I wasn't. But she won't believe me.

I do feel bad that she couldn't sleep because of me. I don't feel bad for staying out though. Though, I do feel bad for drinking too much -_- Again. Ugh.

I should have continued trying to call her, but I think I just got too wasted to remember to call.

I wish I could apologize for worrying her so much, but she won't listen.

So what now? The angry, silent treatment. And no more Thanksgiving dinner with the whole family /:

I feel absolutely horrible for ruining that. Can't do anything about it now. Just have to wait out her anger. But she's probably going to hold onto it and bring it up every time she gets mad at me.

I hope I never turn my worry into anger so easily...