I didn't visit ST today..

Because I had to drive Tony to work and my mother wherever she wanted to go. On any other day, I wouldn't care, but I told her I was planning on going to ST. She just ruined my plan.. I supposed it's ok because she never gave me the ok to go.

But that's not why I decided to update.

I'm pissed off.. She just yelled at me. Stupid bullshit..

For the past month or so, she's been watching GemsTV. I hate that fuckin' channel.. We know how these things work. They cut down the prices, especially now that the economy is down, luring viewers, enticing them. People think they're getting a deal, but we all know they're still just blowing their money.

And my mom's the one who's riding my brother's ass about all the debt we have.. We have debt. Ok. The reasonable thing to do is to cut down on the extra spending. Instead, she wastes money on fuckin' pointless jewelry. The first time she asked me to call in for her, I was already skeptical. I know her spending habits. I've lived with her my whole life. I know. But I can't say shit. Why? Because she's the goddamn adult who's so much more responsible and wise.

Tony definitely doesn't help the situation. I told him that even if the jewelry is cheap now, it adds up. He wants to spoil her. Why? Because he screwed up and he thinks that if he just makes the phone calls, my mom won't scold him as much.

I don't know why people spend money on pointless things like this. It's fine to spend from time to time. But buying something every week is just fuckin' stupid. Especially when she won't even wear the crap. Why won't she wear the stuff? Because someone might mistake her for a rich spender and rob her. Oh, now, why would he think that? And if that's the case, then what is the fuckin' point??

So tonight, just now, my mom bitched at me. Why? Because I refused to call in for a diamond ring. Actually, I dialed. I just delayed it. "I just ordered earrings for you five minutes ago!" Then I didn't remember the item number so I couldn't place the order anyway. So she screamed at me for delaying the dialing. I was pissed. Are you fucking serious? It's just a ring. A pointless ring that you won't wear. Why do you want to get something you're only gonna touch once?

I walked out of the room, saying, "It's just a ring. You don't need it."

Seriously, she's going to yell at me for that? I mean, I know I've done my share of stupid things that deserved her reprimand. But this in no way merited that shit. Stupid.. Ugh.. I'm pissed off. I wish someone was here to back me up. She's not gonna see past "it's your fault." It's gonna keep being my fault. I never get to hear an apology. At least all the other times, she didn't have to apologize because her rationale for those situations was that she cared about me and where my life was heading. You know, parents yell because they care. This time, there's no excuse.

I'm glad I didn't place the order. I save us $150, which she'll probably spend on the next piece of jewelry she sees on the screen when Tony gets home. Fuck it. I'm not gonna call in for her anymore.

I'm not abetting idiocy...













I wish I could just leave. I need a cool-down period. Just being here right now pisses me off. Or it saddens me. I haven't decided which yet. Maybe it's both. Over something so little, so trivial.. No wonder my patience sucks so much..