Interest can be reciprocated.

This past Friday night, I was hanging out with my friend Vivi and catching up. She's been in Portland for almost a year now. Crazy how fast that passed.

Hung out until 1 or 2 in the morning just talking about a bunch of different things.

At some point in our conversation, I decided to reveal to her that I used to be interested in her. I kinda just threw it into the conversation. Well, I mean, there was a point to it. I was talking about how my first crush was on someone I barely knew and how it affected me and my future romantic interests. I find people attractive or cute, but I don't pursue anything unless we become friends first and I get to know them well enough. Basically, every serious interest I've had has been in someone who was a good friend.

I was listing examples of my former romantic interests. And I tried to add her into the list nonchalantly. I think I lingered on it though haha. When I finished the list, it was quiet for a moment. I didn't really think in that moment. Vivi asked me if I felt awkward, and I said yes. She asked why I felt awkward, and I smiled and shrugged. She then said that it was funny because she was interested in me around the same time.

I blanked for a second, and then an incredulous "What?" came out of my mouth haha. I didn't really ask anything about it. I wasn't sure what to ask. Now, I know what I want to ask, but she's back in Portland :P Next time we talk, I'll ask. When exactly? For how long? Etc. Just some details to maybe fluff up my ego haha.

If I had known this back then, I might have made the foolish decision to ask her out or something. But I know, looking back, I wasn't ready. She most likely wasn't either. Both of us had baggage we were incapable of letting go. I could see that then too, but I might have ignored it if I had known.

I'm glad the awkward moment only lasted a moment XD Glad we could carry on like we usually do. It was good haha. Just thought this was something interesting to share.

Now, I'm just a tiny bit more convinced that a person I like could like me as much. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to ask someone out, after I got to know them as a friend first, of course :P I might not get rejected XD Confidence up by 5% hahaha.