First clubbing experience was...

fun :) interesting, etc etc.

This may or may not be a long entry because I'm using Autumn's laptop and everyone's still asleep. I only got three hours of sleep, but I can't sleep anymore :/ Too many thoughts, I suppose. Damn.


So yesterday, Mother dropped me off at Autumn's place downtown around 1630. Maggie was already there. Just chilled and talked. I checked my email and stuff on Autumn's laptop :P Interwebz!

Around 1930, we walked to GJ for dinner. Dominique was our server. We agreed (as well as Brother) that she was cute :P Had cajun popcorn shrimp, cajun curly fries, crawfish hushpuppies, and something something etouffee haha. Oh yeah, can't forget the beignets a la mode. Good stuff. Brother covered the cost, even though he wasn't working. He kept texting me, asking me if everything was good and whatever haha. He's looking out for me and my friends. He really wants them to like me XP

We left the restaurant around 2030, I think. Went to the light rail station to wait for Elora. Had interesting conversations concerning lesbianism and its connection to hugs :P

When Elora came, we walked back to Autumn's to get ready for clubbing. Got our stuff together. We left later than expected, which really isn't much of a surprise. Met up with Ariane and Brian at the Macy's parking lot down the street from the club. Ahh, we were three minutes late for the birthday guestlist :( So Autumn, Elora, and Brian had to pay $15 each to get in.

The club wasn't packed when we came. It didn't become packed either. But it's understandable, Thanksgiving weekend; people go home.

Crystal (from Q&A) was there with her girlfriend and friends. At some point in the night, when I was dancing with my friends, she came up behind me (with a train of people?) and started grinding XP I was like "Uhhhh >_> whaat? ... Ok, whatever, just go with it." My friends were laughing at me because I don't grind :P If I really think about it, I've only done it twice before haha. And why am I always the one in front? -_- I feel so violated haha :P

Anyway, my friends had other clubgoers ask them to dance/grind. All but one were politely rejected. Though, I guess in Maggie's case, it was an unheard rejection :/ We were wary of that guy for the rest of the night. Actually, we were kinda wary of all dancers haha. Just such intense freaking :P and making out as well. Ehhh yeaah haha.

I was pretty much done dancing by 0030. That was like the longest break from any kinda dancing I've ever taken. The dancing is fun, but the club scene just ain't my thang :P But that doesn't mean I'll never go clubbing again. Maybe just once in a long while. For birthdays or something, I dunno.

We left around 0130. Went to Denny's. I was in Ariane's car. We went to the Denny's that was a block away. Brian, Maggie, Autumn, and Elora went to a different one waayyy down the street because they don't know how to listen to directions XP So Ariane and I left a message on Autumn's phone, admonishing her for not turning left haha.

Denny's was good. I got a French Toast Slam, I think it's called. We all mainly wanted drinks though. Service was just blehh. I left like a two-dollar tip.

After the late-night meal, we decided it was time to go back to Autumn's. Brian went home. And yeah, I do give hugs, Brian. Or well, I try >_> Mm, I guess special people in my life get hugs from me at least. From time to time, strangers do too :P

Anyway, I was in Ariane's car again. Followed Autumn's Beluga. So slow haha. Got caught up with Ariane a bit. In terms of her love life and whatnot.

Back at Autumn's, the five of us just talked until 0630 in the morning. Sex and relationships, fun stuff :P Interestingly enough, the majority of our conversations yesterday and this morning revolved around this topic. I felt so left out for much of the conversation though :P But it's all good. I can't relate or anything, but at least I'm learning things? haha I didn't have to share much either XP

Though, I feel like I said too much >_> But of course, they're smart kids, so they figure shit out anyway or just assume. No more asking me about my love life, people. It is nonexistent. It will stay that way because that's just how my life goes. That's how my luck goes. Every single time. So much disappointment. I thought I'd stopped expecting anything, but something always gets me. And I figure some shit out too that should stop me, but I just keep going. No more, no more, no more. I hope. Ugh. Just grr.

Sometimes, I really wish there was an off switch.

My friends tried to convince me of one thing, but I'm totally convinced of the other. Besides, they don't know everything XP

Aaanyway, I learned so many new things. Fun stuffs. Good times. Yep.


Don't know what I'm gonna do now. Wish I'd brought my iPod :/ Maybe I'll just lie down and think. I've been doing that a lot anyway. Think, think, think. Not sure it's productive or progressive, but it's all I'm gonna do. All I feel like I can do.

Blaahhh. I suck when I'm like this. I wish I'd stop. Change focus. Or well, get focus.

And maaan, I wish I would say more. I feel terrible that my friends tell me a lot about their lives, but I don't really give them much about mine. Not the really important stuff, you know. And I'm sorry for that. I'm working on it though. It will be a process, a very slow one, but it will happen.

Egh, I think I've said too much in this entry. But I'm just getting my thoughts down somewhere...


Ooh, so I forgot to post two days ago about three dreams I had. But you know, I don't even remember them all that well anymore. Or I do, but details are fuzzy.

Dream 1: A girl kissed me.

Dream 2: Same girl kisses someone else. And I'm heartbroken.

Dream 3: It had to do with a car accident. Crasher sued crashee for damages and won D:

Don't think Dream 3 was related to the first two haha. But yeah, the first two dreams, how reminiscent of real life. In sooo many ways. Though, the third one is believable too. We live in a fucked-up world filled with fucked-up people..

Ahh, delete delete delete... >_> Ok, I should just stop before I put up shit I'm gonna regret sharing with you. Even though "you" really just includes Maggie haha. Hi, Maggie :P