Repeating myself over and over...

Feels like it anyway. And I really wish I could come up with a creative title. But sadly, I just can't -_- I wish I would blog about not-sad stuff. But I'm wallowing in self-pity, I suppose. I try not to, but it happens. I'm working on it. Seriously, I'm not just saying that. I'm sure I need help, but I don't know how you could help >_> sooo yeah. You just get to read :P and it's all good :) Knowing someone cares enough to read helps. Yep...


My brain feels all jumbled. Music playing all day long. Even when the radio isn't on, when the iPod isn't on. Some songs are stuck on repeat.

I don't want to keep listening to the same songs over and over. But I do anyway.

I've tried to listen to other songs, happier ones, but it was futile. I would just go back to listening to the not-so-happy songs.

"Stop This Song (Lovesick Melody)" by Paramore
"Doesn't Remind Me" by Audioslave
"Stuck On You" by Paramore
"Rain" by Breaking Benjamin
"Crying" by Sugarcult
"Always" by Saliva
"Pray Forgive Me These Mistakes" by Sherwood
"For The Longest Time" by Sherwood
"Save Me" by Unwritten Law
"Perfect" by Simple Plan
"When I'm Gone" by Simple Plan
"Bury My Head" by Kate Walsh
"Car Underwater" by Armor For Sleep
"Adam's Song" by Blink 182
"Doin' Just Fine" by Magnetic North


I can't even relate to half of these songs, but they just fit my mood -_-

I should go drive alone. As I've said before, when I'm driving alone, I just listen to Owl City and Josh Groban. Happy music. Mellow music. Less sad thinking. Or maybe more, but I can stand it then.


You know, I think it's stupid when people argue over the meaning of a song. Especially those songs that may be about love or about God. Regardless of the songwriter's intended meaning, we all give our own discrete meanings to the song when we listen to it. Our own experiences shape our perspective. Our perspective obviously molds our interpretations of things. People need to let it go. Not everyone's going to agree with your interpretation or opinion on everything.

I also feel like some people are just so unsympathetic. The other day, Brother asked me why I kept listening to such sad songs, sad love songs. So emo or whatever. Not like I've gone through anything that bad that I feel the need to listen to these songs.
Well, one, I don't have many songs that fit into my current mood/situation perfectly. Sad love songs come closest, I suppose. Two, if I listened to the other sad songs, would it make a difference? They're still sad. I'm feeling down, so the music fits even if the words don't necessarily do. Three, music is music. Doesn't matter if I'm listening to Simple Plan, 112, or TaeYang. If their song feels like the song to listen to at that point in time, I'm gonna fuckin' listen to it then.

Ah, I'm not angry. Just trying to explain how I'm thinking. I wish I could explain it to the people who don't listen, but I can't. So I'm doing it here.. Sorry.

Hm, I find it ignorant to dislike musicians because their faith as well. Yeah, their faith may influence their music. So what? They're not trying to convert you. Though, if their song is catchy enough, who knows? I listen to Christian-labeled (labeled, as in listeners say so) music: Switchfoot, Sixpence None The Richer, The Fray, Project 86, Anberlin, Underoath, Lifehouse, Cool Hand Luke, Relient K, etc etc. All good music to my ears. I've been dissed for liking them because of their Christian background and all. And you know what? I don't care, as long as people didn't really intend to insult me when they didn't know me.

I dunno. I just don't get it. People don't like a music artist for whatever reason, fine. Why do they feel a need to insult anyone who disagrees? Why do they need to put down the music artist? What does that do really, other than annoy people or put them on the defensive?


Blahdkjfaljffft. I need to stop thinking about such non-happy things -____- This is hard.. I'm not even talking about what I'm really thinking about. Friggin' weaksauce.

Ugh. My head T-T needs to stop going and stopping. Stopping and going. It hurts.

I need to stop complaining. Damn it..


Three weeks have passed since semester ended. Another three until Spring semester starts. Ahh, maan, I can't believe half of my break is already gone. At least it hasn't been completely wasted. I actually kinda can't wait for school to start again. Being home just sucks the life outta me. The most productive I can be at home is when I have to assemble something for Mother or when I blog haha. When school starts, homework will make me feel productive hopefully.


Mm, so in between songs on the radio station in my head, I watched "Turistas" and "Coraline" today.

"Turistas" is somewhat along the same line as "Hostel." Aside from the "Oh shit, that sucks for them" attitude, my sympathy level during the movie was minimal. At most, I could say that I felt scared for the main characters because I thought about how much it would suck if that shit happened to me. Mm hm, and you don't really get to see much of the bad guys. Like you see them, but you don't really learn much about them, except that they don't like gringos. And I have to say the one scene with the surgery was pretty good. Somewhat methodical, I like. All the other scenes that had blood in it were eh... typical action movie stuff with guns and a chase. I was disappointed by that. I thought there would be more disembowelment XP "Turistas" is not a thriller or horror. To me, it's more of an action film with little nudity, a slow plot, and a poorly executed climax haha. 6/10. I wouldn't watch it again unless I just wanted to stare at Melissa George and Olivia Wilde haha. But even then, nah. Though, the water looks amazing :D

"Coraline" was interesting. I remember Madame saying she liked the movie, and so did her grandkids :P I would give it a 7/10. I thought the movie was going to be creepier than it actually was, but it was still good. I couldn't figure out why not everyone on the other side of the door was strictly good or strictly evil. I guess people are still allowed to choose sides in fantasy worlds, hm. And I want to know where the other world came from. Why are the other people the way they are? Does she really want to love a child or what? I don't get it >_> And why is it the mom? Soo many questions. I'm not thinking it through though. And I'm also quite sad about the ending. No one really learns anything. Well, except Coraline, of course. You should never take your family for granted.

Really, you shouldn't take anyone for granted. Yeaah. Maybe I'll expound this thought another time. Hmm.


You know, I like that Blogspot lets you schedule the posting of entries. So convenient sometimes. Mm hmm. Like I've been slowly adding stuff to this entry all day. Scheduled for midnight. I did this so I wouldn't spend several hours on the computer just to write about a bunch of different things and then wanting to edit them. Even though, I ended up not writing about much, I think. And I got to remember things I wanted to write about. Though, I decided not to write about those things :P


And I know. I've been updating about unimportant things. I just don't know what else to blog about, but I want to blog about something, anything, boring things. Even if I don't like that I'm rambling. Ah, rambling. I remember when I could do that in person. Hm. Alas, the audience...

I'll finish that thought some other time... Not that it really matters anyway.


Oh yeah, I totally forgot to mention this in yesterday's blog: When Autumn, Cristina, Harrison, and I were walking back to Autumn's from San Carlos, a black dude on a bicycle stopped us to ask for directions. He was looking for a place that starts with an "H," but he couldn't remember the whole name. So Autumn tried to help him out. She mentioned something about a place that starts with the word "Historical." Then the guy said something like "Oh, I remember the name now. I'm actually looking for a place called Heaven, and I thought I'd ask you three beautiful ladies because y'all must be angels." I smiled, Autumn laughed, and Cristina apparently looked dumbstruck haha. Harrison just stood behind us and stared. The guy rode away on his bike, laughing and saying, "God bless you." After that, we were like, "Who hits on a girl and then says 'God bless you'?" haha Cristina was disappointed that the guy wasn't hot :P

There was also something about "llamas" and "lamas." Had nothing to do with the guy on the bike. It was way before that, when the sun was still out. But it was hilarious >_> Yay for silly misunderstandings.

Yeah, fun memories haha.